![]() ![]() ![]() When they reach this underground floor, they find a dank hallway lit with torches. The kids are met at the door by a butler, who leads them to an elevator and directs them to the "negative third" floor. Chef drops off the kids, but doesn't want to go inside. Kyle notices that the name "Bargin" appears to be hidden in the song's lyrics, and he suggests that they meet with the lyricist himself to learn more about the story of Roland.Ĭhef drives the kids to Warren Zevon's house, which appears to be a small cottage in the middle of nowhere. The next day, Charlie and the boys meet at Kyle's house, and Charlie tells the group about Stan's grandfather's possible involvement in Roland's murder. A bloody 1966 Thompson gun was found in the home. Elderly Frank Bianco was also killed in his own home, and all that was found of him was his head. There has been another murder, similar to that of Lieutenant Bargin. Kyle tells Stan and Charlie to turn on the news. Charlie reassures him that ghosts are not real. Stan and Charlie go upstairs, where Stan expresses concern that Roland's ghost might try to seek revenge on his mother. He had worked in the Congo in the late '60s and was involved in the Congo War. Sharon tells them that her father had actually been a CIA agent too. Charlie mentions that Bargin's father had been a CIA agent. The kids (except for Kenny) cover their ears and complain about the poor quality of the music.Īt dinner that night, Stan brings up the odd murder. Shelley then walks up to the television and turns on a Taylor Swift concert. Charlie admits that the situation is indeed strange, but maintains that she doesn't know anything about it besides what she knows from the song. Then the news reports that the words "Roland's Revenge" were burned into the grass of Bargin's backyard, and that, among his collection of weapons, investigator's had found a blood-stained, unregistered 1966 Thompson gun. She tells them that she had actually based the story on the song "Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner" by Warren Zevon, and that this murder is most likely just a coincidence. The boys are struck by how similar this is to the story Charlie had told the previous night. He was killed in his own home just days after the publication of a tell-all book about his father, who had been a CIA agent working in the Congo in the late '60s. ![]() While watching the news, they see a story about the murder of a man named Lieutenant Bargin. The next morning, the kids are groggy from all the caffeine from the night before. Charlie goes on to say that Roland also wanted revenge against the CIA agents who plotted his death. All that was ever found of Van Owen was his head. He ultimately found him and killed him with a Thompson gun. The hitman, William Van Owen, "blew off Roland's head." Roland became a headless ghost and went out for revenge against Van Owen. He was the best Thompson gunner in his battalion he was so good, in fact, that the CIA paid one of his comrades to murder him. Roland, a heartless psychopath, was able to focus and perform without being distracted by the human suffering the war caused. Eventually, they calm down and decide to tell scary stories.Ĭharlie tells the story of a Norwegian Thompson gunner named Roland who fought against the Bantu in the Congo War in '66 and '67. Kyle provides the group with Red Bull to drink, and for several hours, the group is wildly caffeinated. Charlie is invited to hang out with the guys too (on the condition that she "won't do any girly stuff"). Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny come to Stan's house for a sleepover. When it looks like the ghost might be real, the kids have to save Stan from Roland's wrath. It takes place during the winter of third grade.Ĭharlie tells the boys a spooky story about a headless ghost named Roland who seeks revenge against the CIA agents who planned his murder. ![]() The story is written in the form of a script and, in its entirety, is approximately the length of a half-hour South Park episode. It is based on the song " Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner" by Warren Zevon. Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner (also called Taylor Swift Must Die) is an episode of Threadbare South Park. ![]()
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